This is the right way to grow out your hair

Do I cut it today? It looks like crap. How often can I wear that goddamned wide brimmed fedora!? Not today. Way too windy. I’m cutting it.

It’s been eight months. No haircuts. I committed. But the awkwardness of my hair demands half-man buns and tuques as a matter of course. I even riffle through the oubliette under my bathroom sink for more aggressive product to slick this puffy mess back. Pomade no longer measures up. I settle for body lotion. Sigh. I miss my undercut. I text Christina. She’s been cutting my hair for 14 years. And doing a damn good job. “Haircut?” she responds. Wait, if Leo did it, by God so can I. Neither one of us has an Oscar yet so we’re practically the same guy. I close my eyes. Breathe. One more month I convince myself. “Actually, I need tips on growing it out.” I wait 3 minutes staring at my phone. “No sweat. Come by.” Cool. “This may be for an article” I add. She’s into it.

If you’re growing your hair out or just thinking about it, you need these ten things. They are from a certified hair expert. Christina Gallo is a two decade veteran hair stylist who works at Salon PURE in Montreal. She’s been making me look pretty for years. Like a stylish yeti. Yes, choke on my vanity sandwich. But if you’re growing your hair out, you need this list. Put these ten things on you or in you if you’re going long right now.

SEE ALSO: 7 things you can do to draw attention away from your thinning hair

Patience

Boom. I know, I know. Trust me, I rolled my eyes too. But it’s literally the first thing out of her mouth when I sit down in her chair and she means it. You’ll simply need to be patient. I sigh again and let the common sense wash over me. A little research yielded some numbers. The average person’s hair grows at a rate of about 6 inches a year, or a half inch a month. Genetically speaking though, you may be blessed. Live Science tells us that ancestry plays a role. Asian hair grows fastest at about 6 inches a year, African hair a little slower at around 4 and Caucasian hair typically lands in the middle at 5 inches. Damn. So average, so white. More sighing. No matter your background, growing out your locks means sucking it up through the NUMEROUS awkward phases as your last haircut grows out. Which was probably an undercut like mine. So know what you’re getting into. This is a process. A journey. Not all of you will make it my brothers. But those with stalwart hearts may go as far as Jared Leto (post Joker). If you believe. You must believe.

Cut your hair

Yup. Seems a little counterintuitive but experts like Christina agree, you need to get a trim about every 3 months to keep your hair looking healthy. Does this make your hair grow faster? Absolutely not. That myth has been debunked. Hair grows from the root. Not the tip. But trimming helps manage split ends. If you’ve seen a woman’s shampoo ad, you’ve heard of these “split ends” I speak of. Your man hair isn’t magically immune because testosterone, it’s just been short for so long you’ve never had to deal with trichoptilosis. Science name drop. Split ends happen when your hair’s outer layer is stripped down by thermal, chemical or mechanical stress. Think hair dryer, pomade and aggressive or regular combing. So, pretty much everything you’ve been doing to get that gentleman's undercut the kids love so much. Now that you’ll be cutting your hair less, you’ll have to be wary, or be ugly. When your hair splits down the middle it’ll look unhealthy and wiry. Christina explains it’ll actually seem to cause a plateau in your hair growth by looking shorter and shorter as your hair grows from the root. Like a log through a splitter. So get a trim every season.

Use conditioner

This is must. Get up. Go to the pharmacy. Buy conditioner. And if you want to grow your hair out the right way, toss out your 2 in 1 on the way. While one bottle feels more efficient, and less expensive, it simply doesn’t work. It’s hogwash. Malarkey. Poppycock. A lie. Ok it works a little, but barely.  Christina’s example: 2 in 1s are the equivalent of throwing a dryer strip into your washing machine and expecting your clothes to come out static free when you dry them. Or, if I need to bro it down, it’s like washing and waxing your car at the same time. You may end up with a bit of wax on your car but not an ideal amount to benefit. Despite what the marketing promised. Same goes for your man mane. Don’t you want your man mane to benefit? Of course you do. The real issue is that 2 in 1 products are typically heavy in silicone, which clings to your hair and leaves it more manageable but it at also clings to your scalp, clogging pores and impeding growth.  Get yourself a decent shampoo and a decent conditioner. In separate bottles.